Sometimes, I just need it to be about ME. Now, I know that may sound completely selfish and vain, but it is what it is. The vast majority of my time is spent taking care of other people, being there for other people, listening to other people, putting other peoples needs before my own. Which I am not complaining about at all, but it sometimes wears on me. I try to be a good wife, a good momma, a good daughter, a good friend. I love the people in my life fiercely and I want to please them. But honestly, I sometimes want to just throw my hands up in the air and say, "Forget it! I can't do it all! I can't please everyone! So I'm just gonna be me, and if you don't like that, then I'm sorry." I'm not perfect, by any means...but I'm enough! I will not listen to the lies of the enemy. I will not lose myself, because I'm so focused on what everyone else expects me to be. It's been a bit of a hard month for me, for reasons that I can't write about. (Can you tell?!) I have had to fight the tendency to want to lay in bed and be sad and depressed. I miss Tulsa. I miss our school, church, house, friends, everything there...I miss life as it was a year ago.
But what can I do? Just keep smiling and taking things a day at a time. Keep trying to be the best me that I can be!
And get my hair done...hair appt days are my favorite days!
Brian knows how to make any bad day better! Don't worry, I didn't eat them all! At least not in one setting!
Have I mentioned how much I love this bathtub?! Again, it makes everything better.
There is much that I can't put into writing here, so I will just say...
I. Miss. This.
My heart aches.
I love my friends.
Sigh::
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