A Special Thanksgiving Full of Surprises

We got to share our exciting news with our families over Thanksgiving weekend! This was the first year in several years that we actually spent Thanksgiving Day at G-Ma's house. I wasn't sure how we were going to tell everyone, and at the last minute, right before it was time to pray and eat, I asked Poppa Jim if he would make the announcement. He was honored to be asked and it was such a sweet moment as he told everyone that Mackenzie and Madison were going to be big sisters again, and Jonah was going to be a big brother! I wish so badly I had that on video...but that is a sure sign of the state of mind I was in and how awful I felt. Boo! I was definitely a little nervous about how people were going to respond. After all, I am 37 and our kids are older...this was definitely a big shocker...but everyone was genuinely very happy for us and completely supportive and excited. It was a very Happy Thanksgiving, even though I just pretty much ate and laid in bed the whole time. 

A few days later, on Saturday, we went to Tulsa for Thanksgiving with the Baldwins. Brian decided to make this little game, that had Thanksgiving phrases that people had to race to guess. He made the last one "Candace Is Pregnant" and it was hilarious because nearly every single letter was filled in before anyone dared guess what it said! Everyone was very surprised, but also very sweet with their responses. One more sweet Baldwin grand baby to love on! 

I was relieved once our family knew and I didn't have to keep the secret so much anymore. We still waited another week or so, before posting on social media and really going public with it. 

I didn't take many pictures over Thanksgiving weekend, but here are the few that I got:

I don't know if it was because I was pregnant and so sick, or whether this puzzle is just genuinely the hardest I've ever worked on...but I gave up! Uncle Clint gets most of the credit this time. Maybe we will finish it at Christmas?

Uncle Clint showing Mackenzie how to carve a turkey...

Wouldn't be Thanksgiving without the Rockettes...this is just one of the MANY reasons we love G-Ma so much! Makes me laugh...and laugh...and laugh!! This will go down in history as one of the best videos ever...and I may even use it as blackmail someday! =0) 

We were so glad Grandma Shaw got to be with us for a few hours to eat lunch on Thanksgiving Day! She isn't able to communicate very much at all, and I'm not sure if she knew who we were most of the time, but it was so good to have her there. 

This was hilarious...I came across this super cute t-shirt while I was laying in bed feeling sick and took a screen shot of it...pretty sure I needed it...I was scrolling through my pics at the table after lunch and showed it to Bunny...she exploded and was like "WHAT?!?! You don't talk like this! NO!" And I was literally sitting there like "What in the world is she talking about?!" I missed those two little marked out letters "af." Oops. Yeah, I don't need this shirt! 

We had a great laugh over it though! 

I loved this so much...Each of Mrs. Talley's students wrote a one line prayer, which she compiled into "Our Song of Thanksgiving." Madison's is #1..."Lord, you died on the cross for my sins, which I don't deserve. Thank you."

And just a few pics from Thanksgiving at Uncle Danny & Aunt Amy's house...again, I just didn't feel good and didn't feel like taking pictures. 

This is when we let the kids call and tell the Easterwood girls! They acted so goofy...I had to trim down the video because I got completely annoyed with them for being silly and not just telling their exciting news! But...once they finally spit it out, it was fun and sweet! 

Grandparents Chapel

Madi & Jonah had Grandparents Chapel at school this week and we were so glad that G-Ma and Poppa & Louise could be there! They got to show off their classrooms & some of their artwork and recent projects, and also have Chapel together. Last year, I went to Grandparents Chapel too, but I just couldn't drag myself out of bed for it this time. G-Ma and Louise both took pictures and sent them to me! We called Poppa and Louise on FaceTime the night before and told them about the baby, because I knew the kids would have a hard time being with them and not saying anything. =0)

I am thankful for...(translation) "spending time with my family, God, Jesus, my house, Bible, and I'm not sure what that last part means!"

I'm fairly sure the translation for this is something like 'I like to hang out at their house." Hmm...we've got some work to do! 

Pregnancy After Miscarriage

Four years ago, we were expecting a sweet baby & on November 17th, at 11 weeks, I had a miscarriage. I had never experienced grief and heartache like that in my life. That baby was due on my birthday, June 7th and would be 3 1/2 years old now. I still think of our sweet baby in heaven often...especially every November 17th and every June 7th. We weren't planning to have a 4th baby when I got pregnant four years ago...and when we lost the baby, I didn't think it was something I could ever attempt again, because the pain was so deep...but I also didn't want to deal with the emotions of making a permanent decision about that either. So we were just careful & my cycles were regular and nothing happened...until it did. Ha! I mentioned it before, but we were planning for Brian to have a vasectomy before the end of December, when I found out I was pregnant at the end of October. God had other plans for our family, that included giving us another baby, right before we made that decision...His timing is always perfect!

I have to say though, going through pregnancy after having had a miscarriage is very scary. Like I can't hardly even let my heart fully accept that this is real, because I'm so fearful that we are never going to get to hold this baby, like the last time. I worry over every little thing I eat and the air I breathe, I worry if I stretch a certain way or sneeze too hard, I worry when I take Tylenol for a horrible headache and I worry over taking medicine prescribed for nausea, I worry about sleeping the wrong way...I worry constantly that I'm going to do something to make me lose this baby too. 

And I KNOW what the Bible says about not worrying. Trust me. I do. And I'm really trying to just take things a day at a time and to trust in the Lord with all my heart! 

I came across this image with the Bible verse Isaiah 60:22 that says "When the time is right, I the Lord, will make it happen." And the quote goes on to say Sleep in peace tonight, God is in control.

I know that I just have to lay down my worries and fears & trust that God is in control...He is the Creator and giver of life & his plans are not to harm us, but they are for our good. I still sometimes struggle with why we lost our baby four years ago...but I know that God is still working all things together for our good, because we love Him and we are called according to his purpose. The Bible promises it, so I believe it! This is where I have to lay the pen down and just let God do the writing of our story. 

And now, when people ask how many children we have, I will say 4, but in my heart it will always be 5. Never forgotten..

SURPRISE!!! (It's Not a Puppy!)

So since the kids surprised us by getting out all of the Christmas decorations, we decided to surprise them with our big news! I originally was planning to wait a few more weeks to tell them, but they were starting to ask often about why I was so sick and I didn't want their little minds to worry about me. And, I felt good about our first ultrasound and decided we should go ahead and tell them. There was no way possible we were going to be able to keep it a secret until the first trimester was over, because I was just too sick and not my normal self at all. I was a little scared of telling them so early, because of the miscarriage last time, but I am having to learn to trust the Lord with that every day, and I don't want to walk in fear. 

I have to say that I got a little emotional and had to choke back some tears as I took this picture right before we told them. It was the last picture "when there were three" in my mind...before we told them another baby was coming and their world would change forever. I know that's a little dramatic, but I'm pregnant so I can blame everything on hormones. 

I put the ultrasound pictures inside of a Christmas box and had them all sit in front of the tree. I wasn't really sure how they would respond, but they all three had very different reactions. I'm pretty sure they all three would have been much more excited about a puppy than another baby...(sorry baby #4...when you read this years and years from now, you can give your sisters and brother a hard time about it!)

I posted this pic of their expressions on Instagram several weeks later, once the news was out and this was my caption: 

"The look on Mackenzie's face when we told them we were having another baby! So. Funny. LOL! Their responses:

Mackenzie: You're lying...and its NOT sleeping in my room.

Madison: I don't want you to have another baby...it will take my place...complete sobbing meltdown (broke my heart)...to Oh I hope it's a girl and PLEASE can it sleep in my room?

Jonah: It better be a boy!"

Madison's response of crying and not wanting us to have another baby because it would take her place just really broke my heart. We spent a lot of time loving on her and reassuring her that there was no way a baby could ever take her place. I just think she needed a little time to process her feelings. I told her that I was a little sad at first too, because I liked our family just the way it was too. But that God had other plans for our family & this baby would be a great blessing. It didn't take her long to change her tune and start begging for the baby to sleep in her room and making lists of baby names! 

Mackenzie's reaction was just what I suspected it would be! When I was her age, I LOVED babies...I already had paid babysitting jobs...and literally my whole life all I really wanted to do was have babies. Not Mackenzie. She will be the first to say she really isn't a "baby person." =0) But I'm pretty sure this baby is going to soften her up and change her mind a little! She just wanted to make sure we knew it was NOT going to sleep in her room! Lol! 

Jonah just wants it to be a boy! Haha! He is going to definitely be a little sad if it isn't a brother, but we keep telling him that God knows what is best for our family & no matter what, he will love this new baby! There's a part of me that gets a little sad thinking about Jonah not being the only boy...we just have a very special relationship...so I would be okay with it being another girl. But at the same time, I would really love to have another baby boy too! Time will tell... =0) And, either way, Jonah is going to be such a sweet big brother to this baby! 

Now here came the tricky part...we weren't ready for everyone to know about this yet...and this was a BIG secret to ask them to keep. We told them they could tell one friend if they just absolutely had to, but not to shout it from the rooftops just yet. Jonah definitely had the hardest time keeping it a secret! When we picked him up from Sunday school the next morning Brian asked if he told anyone about the baby...he said, very proudly "Nope, I just told my teacher that my mommy has something in her tummy, but I can't tell what it is." LOL! And then again on Monday at school when it was time for prayer requests, he asked if they could pray for his Mommy because she is sick and has something in her tummy but its a secret. I laughed so hard! We knew once the kids found out, a few people would start knowing, but we were really hoping to keep it a secret from the rest of our family until we were together on Thanksgiving. 

Sweet Baby,

You don't know it yet, but you have the best big sisters & big brother in the whole wide world! They are going to love and spoil you so much, and you will never be bored, with the three of them to entertain you all of the time! 

The Big Three...

(Yep, I'm a This is Us fan!)

Oh I was definitely not feeling well when we took this picture. 

Sneaky Little Elves!

Madison had a basketball game on Saturday morning, and then we came back home and I crawled right back into bed. That's where I spend most of my time these days...Brian laid down to take a nap too, and all of a sudden we started hearing a bunch of noise and movement coming from upstairs. The kids had been whispering a lot on our way home, so I knew they were up to something. Well, they decided to surprise us and get out all of the Christmas decorations from the attic in Jonah's closet. It was very sweet (and a little manipulative, because I'm sure they knew if they asked us we would say no...haha)! I have to say that I was a little bit sad, laying there in bed and listening to them going through the Christmas tubs, once I figured out what they were doing...I LOVE decorating for Christmas with them and I didn't want to miss out! But, I also loved how excited they were to surprise me! Brian got up and helped them bring the tree down the stairs and set it up for them. They put on the lights all on their own and then once they realized just how many tubs of Christmas decorations we have and what an overwhelming task they had embarked upon, they decided to go ahead and reveal their little surprise to me, so I could help them with the rest! =0) I acted completely shocked and surprised, as if I had no idea what they had been up to! We dug out the rest of our ornaments and tree decorations & pushed the rest of the tubs into the dining room to deal with another day. (Well I think they actually sat in there like that for weeks.)

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here! Now I'm going back to bed...but I sure do love these sneaky little elves! 

This is what I saw when I opened my eyes...they even had a big present under the tree for me...

I loved it!! 

They had stuff strung EVERYWHERE!